Monday, April 10, 2017

Man wearing ‘Drunk Lives Matter’ shirt arrested for DUI

Sometimes, words just speak for themselves, like when a Pennsylvania man wearing a shirt that read, “Drunk Lives Matter” was busted for drunk driving. According to a Facebook post published by the Newville Police Department, Elwood Gutshall III, 44, was stopped when police spotted his pick-up truck committing several traffic violations. Gutshall was taken into custody and a blood draw revealed his blood alcohol content was .217 percent. He was charged with Driving Under the Influence at a Highest Rate, Driving Under DUI Suspension and additional traffic violations. (Newville Police Facebook)

 

Woman avoids being stung when thousands of bees fall on her head

An Oklahoma woman helping a beekeeper remove a hive from a tree ended up with thousands of bees falling on her head — and miraculously, no stings. April Collins of The Village said she noticed the bees swarming outside the hive in a tree outside her home last week and summoned a beekeeper. Collins said she wanted to remove the bees from her yard, but she wanted to make sure they weren’t harmed. Video of the attempted removal shows Collins and the beekeeper working to clip the branch holding the hive when the branch shakes, sending thousands of the insects falling onto Collins’ head. Collins said she somehow came away from the encounter without a single sting. Unfortunately, the beekeeper wasn’t so lucky. He did get at least three stings  The branch was removed from the tree and placed in a box in the back of Beekeepers car. He said the bees will have a new home in one of his backyard hives. (KOCO TV)

 

Winter Haven homeowner calls police after ‘flying’ catfish lands in pool

A Florida man investigating a loud crash on his screened porch made a bizarre discovery: A catfish had fallen out of the sky into his pool, and it was still alive. Leonard Vanderpool of Winter Haven said he and his wife were watching TV Monday night when they heard a loud crash on their screened porch. Vanderpool said he went outside to find there was a hole in the lanai — and a catfish in his backyard pool. Vanderpool’s wife, Dawn, said police made sure to take photos to make sure their colleagues would believe the story. “It didn’t seem like people would believe it. It is crazy,” Dawn Vanderpool said. “[The officer] had to take pictures because he knew they wouldn’t believe him back at the station.” The Vanderpools and the police officer eventually came to the conclusion that a bird of prey had snatched the catfish out of the water, intending to make it into a meal, and accidentally dropped it over the screened porch. “The fish probably stung it with its horns, because bullheads have horns, and he dropped it right through my screen,” Leonard Vanderpool said. “When we had it out you could see talon marks on its back.” The lucky fish, which did not seem to have any severe injuries, was released into Lake Ruby. (WFLA TV)

 

Woman found wet and nearly naked, claiming to be a mermaid

Local authorities are asking for help identifying a nearly naked woman found wandering down a Fresno, California street Tuesday (4/4) morning. The woman’s hair was wet when she was found. She told officers that she was a mermaid, and that her name was Joanna, according to the Fresno Police Department. The woman, who has two webbed toes on both feet, told officers that she had been in the water, but replied “I don’t know” to “most questions,” police said. She is 5-foot-4, weighs about 150 pounds and has brown eyes and brown hair. She was found walking down the middle of road across from the Eagle Spring Golf & Country Club, about a mile south of Table Mountain. Police are asking for anyone with information about her identity is asked to call (559) 621-2455 or email the missing persons unit Detective Paul Hill at paul.hill@fresno.gov. (Fox 5 San Diego)

 

You can get paid just for staying in bed for two months 

Researchers are looking to pay people to sleep for a study at the Institute for Space Medicine and Physiology in Toulouse, France. New male contraceptive is injected into testicles — and can be reversed Participants will be required to spend every waking — and unconscious — moment on their backs in bed for 60 days. The study will attempt to recreate the conditions of space by looking at the impact of microgravity, which is the state of virtual weightlessness. “The idea of this study is to reproduce the weightlessness of the International Space Station,” Dr. Arnaud Beck, who is leading the experiment. For doing essentially nothing, the volunteers will be paid around $17,000. Candidates must be healthy men between the ages of 20 to 45, who do not smoke or have allergies. Men need not apply if their body mass index isn’t between 22 and 27. During the study, the men will have to eat and perform all bodily functions in bed for two months. The participants will then spend two weeks undergoing tests to measure the effects of weightlessness. Interested in the job? (Medes)

 

Texas masturbation bill is now in the hands of the Texas State Affairs Committee

In March, Texas State Rep. Jessica Farrar, D-Houston, filed a bill that would penalize men for “unregulated masturbatory emissions” and the bill has now made its way into the hands of the Texas State Affairs Committee. The committee is typically the panel that hears abortion-related legislation and it will now address Farrar’s House Bill 4620, which is named the “Men’s Right to Know Act.” The bill contains provisions that would put restrictions on masturbation, vasectomies, Viagra prescriptions and colonoscopies, including:

  • The state must create a booklet called “A Man’s Right to Know” that contains information on the benefits of and risks of vasectomies, Viagra prescriptions and colonoscopies. A man must review the booklet before getting the procedure.
  • A doctor must get consent from the man before providing any of the treatments. The man may only get the treatment after waiting 24 hours and reviewing “A Man’s Right to Know.”
  • A man will be fined $100 for “unregulated masturbatory emissions.” The fines will benefit children in the care of the Department of Family and Protective Services.
  • A man must receive a rectal exam and an MRI of his rectum before receiving treatments.
  • A man can’t sue a doctor for refusing to provide these treatments if the procedure violates the doctor’s “personal, moralistic, or religious beliefs.”
  • The state must establish a registry of nonprofit organizations and hospitals that provide abstinence counseling, a supervising physician for “masturbatory emissions,” and semen storage.
  • “Masturbatory emissions” must be stored for the wife to use for conception at a later time.

The bill is a response to the current state law that requires doctor’s give women considering an abortion the “A Woman’s Right to Know” booklet, which Farrar refers to as a “guilt mechanism.” (Houston Chronicle)

 

Man Accused Of Impersonating Police Officer After Pulling Deputy Over

A Fort Coffee man is accused of impersonating a police officer after pulling an undercover deputy over. Deputy Tyler Ragan was driving north on Lock and Dam Road in an unmarked vehicle Saturday night (April 1), when he noticed flashing lights behind him. “The person had tried to come up around my vehicle that I was in and I noticed that it wasn’t a police car,” Ragan said. Records show 46-year-old Roger O’Hara was driving a red Chevy pickup truck with a flashing red and blue light mounted on the windshield. When investigators asked O’Hara why he had the LED lights in his truck, he said he was tired of people speeding through the area and items getting stolen. O’Hara stated he “wanted to clean up the area.” Deputy Ragan said O’Hara had a 9mm pistol on him and another gun in his truck. O’Hara told deputies he had a concealed carry permit. O’Hara has since bonded out of jail. He is now facing a felony charge for impersonating a police officer. If convicted, he could get two to 10 years in prison. According to the LeFlore County Sheriff’s Office O’Hara has a protective order against him, but no record of criminal history. (KFSM TV)

 

Hack Caused 156 Emergency Sirens To Go Off In Dallas

Residents in Dallas had a rude awakening Friday night when 156 emergency sirens wailed throughout the city, and officials are saying the sirens were triggered by a hack. City officials say the sirens were triggered just before 11:45 p.m. Friday (4/7) and that the Office of Emergency Management went through protocols to turn them off. The OEM successfully deactivated the siren system at around 1:20 a.m. Saturday while trying to determine what caused them to trigger. Officials were able to confirm Saturday afternoon Dallas’ emergency siren system was hacked. The city cannot say how the system was hacked, but it believes the hack was done within the Dallas area. Mayor Mike Rawlings described the situation as an example of the city’s need to upgrade and safeguard the city’s technology infrastructure. The FCC was notified to assist in identifying the source of hack according to city officials. The city is also working to put in safeguards to avoid these types of hacks again. (CBS DFW)

 

Today’s Monday Mania is brought to you by:

*ASPCA (American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals) Day
*National Farm Animals Day
*National Sibling Day
*Salvation Army Founder’s Day
*Safety Pin Day

 

 

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